Living life in the carpool lane..

Posts Tagged ‘funny

M is funny.  She’s suddenly acquired this arsenal of jokes.  I think she heard one from school and then decided to make up a bunch of them herself.

Here are a few that she loves telling.

What do you call a witch that lives on the beach?
A sandwhich!

What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Pork chop!

What do you call a fly that lives in butter?
A butterfly!

What do you call a fly that lives in fire?
A firefly!

What do you call a cone that lives in ice?
An ice cream cone!

What do you call a hopper that lives in the grass?
A grasshopper!

Her execution and enthusiasm when she tells these jokes is what makes them so funny!  She ends each joke by asking, “Get it?”  It’s very cute!

I can’t wait for her to read these jokes again when she’s older to see what a silly little preschooler she used to be.

In some random conversation, Hubby and I were talking about what age we met each other.

He had just turned 30.  I was 27. 

The conversation then progressed into the following…

Me:  And it was all downhill from there.
Hubby: Yup!
Me:  How sad, you could at least say something nicer..
Hubby:  Yes dear.  It was all UPHILL from there.  Me: ….

Somehow, that didn’t seem like a nicer response….

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I’ve been watching Sex and the City on my iPad.

Thank you, Amazon Prime.

This has got to be the third time that I have gone through this series in my lifetime.  I can’t help it.  Once I start it, I have to go through the whole series.  It doesn’t seem to get old.  It’s gotta be one of my favorite television shows.

I find myself narrating my blog posts as I type it in a total “Carrie Bradshaw” way…

I think it’s amusing.

This is the story about sprinkles.

Untitled

Yes, those sprinkles.  Those sprinkles are M’s favorite ice cream topping.  No matter where we go for ice cream, she always wants sprinkles.

One time, Hubby and M went on a daddy/daughter date to a local ice cream place.  Hubby, always wanting to save an extra buck, decided to put that bottle of sprinkles into his pocket to add to M’s ice cream after ordering it.

The ice cream was ordered, and they went outside to eat their treats.  Hubby pulls the sprinkles out of his pocket and adds them to M’s ice cream.  She was delighted at the idea of “pocket sprinkles” and Hubby was so happy he was able to save a dollar.

Win-win!

Now, whenever we have ice cream at home, M always makes sure to ask for “pocket sprinkles.”

It’s totally a thing for our family now.

Sprinkles will just never be the same.

 

I broke the Ikea stool months ago.  I stepped on it and it cracked.  We did not throw it away, but continued using it until recently.  M never lets me forget that I broke that stool.  This conversation happened on July 6, 2015.

M:  You keep breaking my stool.
Me:  Me?  How do you know?
M:  Well, I’M not breaking it.  You step and show the crack!

Thank you, my dear M, for reminding me how much heavier I am since K was born. 

Gotta love the mind of a three year old..

M’s vocabulary is really developing in leaps and bounds.  This past week, my parents and I have seen a definite growth her her communication skills.

She can definitely tell me what she wants, or what she wants to accomplish.  She’s also getting really good at telling you what to do!

The cat at my parents house is mainly a house cat.  She does love going out into the garage, and will sometimes try to sneak outside completely.  Usually, she stays inside.

While the family was packing up and getting ready for a small outting, the cat was hovering near the door looking for an opportunity to step out into the garage, but because we were going to use the garage to go outside, we weren’t allowing her to go.

M notices the cat trying to go outside and says..

“Oh no, Mittens!  Not poh-toh-go outside!”
Translation:  Oh no, Mittens!  Not supposed to go outside!

It really was the cutest thing.. she was saying it with so much conviction and passion.  Mittens the cat was really not supposed to go outside and she was adamant!

I wish I recorded it.. but you just never know when these moments happen!

A few days ago on Facebook, Disney Baby posted a blog post on “10 Funny Things You Find Yourself Doing Now That You’re A Mom (or Dad)”

Click here for the article.

It’s pretty funny and I totally relate to a few.

The Phantom Cry
Guilty as charged!  I’ve especially when M was a newborn.  I’d hear her cry from another room, only to find out that it was all my imagination..

A Love For Kid’s Music
I’ve been known to belt out a few Fresh Beat Band tunes in the car on my way home from work.  I also know every theme song to every show M watches on Disney Jr and Nick Jr.  It helps a lot in when M is feeling restless in the car.  I can always distract her with the theme song from Special Agent Oso or Doc McStuffins.. Yes, I take requests.

Why Are You Swaying Like That?
I’ve heard this question a bajillion times.  I’ve been seen swaying while standing in Church while Hubby is carrying M.  I’ve had the hand on my back several times telling me, “You can stand still, you aren’t holding the baby.”  It’s good for a little giggle every now and then.. why can’t I stop swaying?!

Pat, Pat, Pat
Definitely guilty here!  I “pat, pat” so much that whenever I hold M, she starts to “pat, pat” me!  Don’t get me started on the “pat, pat” of others.. it’s just too much patting!

Wipes Are The Magical Cure All
You can frequently hear me say, “Quick, get me a wipe!” for anything.. It’s so easy, especially when you buy those boxes from Costco!  You have to use them for everything, or else you’ll never make a dent in your stash!

Those are pretty much the ones I seem to identify with the most.  Click the link and read the article and tell me which are the ones that hit home for you!

M’s got this weird little habit of cackling..

It almost sounds like a witch’s cackle.

Seriously, it’s wierd.

At first, it started out as a horse’s neigh.  She received a rocking horse as a Christmas gift from her Godfather, and she would make the horse sound..

Then, when she got excited, she’d do this little scream/squeal.. totally girly.

Suddenly, she mixed the two together.. and now its a witch’s cackle!

She does it when she gets excited, or if it’s just too quiet in the apartment and she feels the need to make some noise.

Sometimes she does it when we are all in bed, in the dark, when she’s rolling around and blowing off some last minute steam before falling asleep.  When she does that, it kinda freaks me out.  It’s dark in our bedroom, then suddenly we hear her little cackle..

So wierd.

What weird things have your kids been up to lately?!

I haven’t had a post like this for a LOOOOOONG time.  Not because my husband isn’t saying anything blog-worthy, but because I can never remember what he says by the time I’m ready to sit down at my computer and blog about it.

It must be residual “prego-brain” but I have heard that it never really goes away…

The other night, I had a headache…

Hubby:  You know, when I get a stomachache, that usually means my stomach is empty.  So, if you have a headache, that might mean that your head…

I didn’t even let him finish that thought.. we just started laughing and laughing.. so much that M started laughing, even though I’m pretty sure she didn’t know what was going on.. she just wanted to laugh.

I hope I start remembering more of the “things my husband says..”  He’s such a comedian.. NOT!

Me:  M, what does your butt-butt say?
Little M:  Phhhhhhhhbt!

Well.. she is right.


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