Living life in the carpool lane..

Posts Tagged ‘preconception

Well, we aren’t pregnant this month.  I really thought this could have been our chance.  I was two days late.  I thought there could be a chance.

That first day I missed my “monthly” I was pretty excited.  I was excited but I didn’t say anything about it.  I wanted to be optimistic, but I also wanted to remain realistic.  I wanted to take a test right there, but hubby talked me out of it.   Good thing, I would have wasted a pregnancy test.  Those things are expensive!

Early next day, I felt ‘signs.’  Without getting into too much detail, I just knew I wasn’t pregnant and it was only a matter of time before that final confirmation came.

The whole day was completely ruined.  I cried.  I cried all day in my cubicle at work.  I cried in my car on the way home from work.  I felt so discouraged.  My day was a total blur. 

When Hubby and M got home, it didn’t change my mood.  I was in such a fog of sadness and disappointment.  I tried to be ‘normal’ but I just couldn’t muster up any energy. 

That day went on without the arrival of the monthly visitor, so even though I knew it wasn’t going to happen, there was still a little ping of hope that I could be pregnant.  I had to keep bringing myself back to the reality that it wasn’t happening this month.  I fell asleep bawling into my husband’s arms.

I woke up the next morning much more accepting of our fate.  I was more resigned to the fact that we just had to try again.  I ended up getting my confirmation that day.  I was NOT pregnant.  I didn’t feel as bad as I did the day before.  Maybe I was all cried out.  Maybe I was just done.  Maybe I was numb.

Who knew this journey would be such a rollercoaster of emotions?  The past few months were disappointments, but it wasn’t devastating like it was this month.  I’m still sad, and the thought of trying again makes me feel so anxious, and not in a good way. 

I know I have to relax.  I know I have to let things be.  I know I have to trust that God will bless us when it is the right time.  I know all these things.  I’ve heard all these things. 

It doesn’t change how badly it’s made me feel.

I have to remember that although we are struggling to make this second child, we have a pretty awesome daughter already.   We’re already blessed. 

So, no.  We aren’t pregnant yet. 

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Before getting pregnant with M, there were certain precautions I took.  I started before Hubby and I even got married since I knew we wanted to start pretty quickly after we wed.

This time, I’m trying to do the same thing.

At the start of the year, I started taking prenatal vitamins. 

I did the “master cleanse” but I decided to stop early because I wanted to make sure that my body wasn’t too acidic from all the lemon water. 

I’ve increased my water intake.  I’ve stopped drinking coffee. 

Today, I started drinking a cup of milk in the morning.  

I’ve also increased my spinach and red meat intake.  When I was pregnant with M, I was anemic from the beginning.  By the time I was halfway through my pregnancy, I had to take iron supplements twice a day in addition to trying to eat more spinach and red meat.  This time, I’m going to try to eat the spinach and red meat (and other iron-rich foods) early on so that when I do get pregnant, I hope to not be anemic.  And if I do end up anemic, I hope that I don’t have to bump myself up to two iron supplements again. 

So far, I’m liking the idea of a second pregnancy.  The first time around, everything was new, everything was scary, everything was unknown.  Now, I have the experience, and I know how to deal and prepare.

How do you prepare yourself for pregnancy?  What are your preconception preparations?

So I did “the cleanse” again last week.

The plan was to do this cleanse every three months until I hit target weight.

I started the cleanse at roughly 136lbs.  After one week, I ended at about 134lbs.

I’m ending the cleanse after this past week.

I’m ending at 134lbs.

I’m happy with this.  I’m so very happy with this.  When I was at 160+ lbs, I thought that getting back down to this was going to be absolutely impossible.  I got rid of all my old jeans, I got rid of all my old tops, and I accepted the fact that I may never been this size again.

I’m glad I was able to do this and now I know that I can do this again after a second pregnancy.

As for a second pregnancy, this is why I’m ending the cleanse after one week.  No, I’m not pregnant, but I’m definitely wanting to get pregnant this year, maybe even as soon as next month or so!

I’ve already started taking pre-natal vitamins and I’ve already cut down on my caffeine intake significantly.  I just really need to think of preparing my body than losing the weight.

I’m ending the cleanse because I’m changing my focus from losing weight to baby prepping..

Sound good?  Sounds great to me!

 

It’s been almost a week since I started this whole “preconception” thing.  For a refresher, click here.

I’ve had coffee twice.  Small cups.  No more venti sizes for me.  AND, I’ve stopped using all that fake sugar Splenda. 

I actually liked the Splenda and fake sugars.  For me, they made my coffee taste so much sweeter.  I know that those fake sugars are bad for me.  But, sheesh!  They were sweet!

When I caved the other day and purchased a tall coffee, I used Sugar In The Raw. 

My coffee did not taste sweet.  I’ve depended on the sweetness of fake sugars, like Splenda and Equal, for so long that I never enjoyed how real sugar made my stuff taste.

Oh well. 

I’ve been on my pre-natal vitamins for about a week too.  Everytime I take it, I feel yucky.  I totally remember feeling yucky the first time I was taking it too.  I started taking it a month before Hubby and I got married and I remember just feeling so gross for about a week or two.  I guess it takes a while for a body to adjust to the sudden influx of all these vitamins.

I have to admit that I don’t feel AS bad as I did the first time.  That’s a start, right?

I know I will be able to kick this coffee habit again.  I did it for M, I can do it for the next one.

But it’s so hard!  It’s difficult because I’m up late dealing with a toddler that isn’t sleepy during bedtime.  Then, I have to get up early to get to work.  I need that caffeine boost.

I can do it though.  I know I can. 

Oh coffee… why do I love you so??

No, I’m not pregnant.

But, we’re planning to be.

Talks about Baby Number Two are definitely being brought to the table.  It’s a definite possibility that we may give ourselves the green light to make Number Two a reality..

So…

It’s time to start preparing.

With M, we knew we wanted to start trying after we got married and settled down into a place of our own.

So about a month before we got married, I stopped drinking coffee and I started taking pre-natal vitamins.

That’s what I’m doing now.  I stopped drinking coffee yesterday and took my first pre-natal yesterday.

I have to say, because I know WHY I’m giving up coffee, it’s not so bad.  It’s definitely not like when I give up coffee for Lent, and I’m totally craving it by the second day… does that make me a bad Catholic?!

I’m not 100% sure when we are going to say, “Yes.  Let’s go for it.”  But it’s good to know that my body will be ready for it when that time comes…

What do you do to prepare yourself for a pregnancy?


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