Living life in the carpool lane..

Posts Tagged ‘cosleeping

If you’ve read this blog for awhile, you know we are cosleepers.

All four of us are in the bed at night.

It’s great until the 3 year old wakes up.

It’s great until the 3 year old wakes up at 4 am.

It’s great until the 3 year old wakes up at 4 am and wakes up her baby sister.

It’s great until the 3 year old wakes up and 4 am and wakes up her baby sister, falls back asleep and leaves ME to take care of the baby that’s now wide awake.

I’m just saying.

I’m having laptop issues at the moment so I’m writing using my mobile app. Please excuse any and all typos I may overlook…

We still cosleep with M. Her toddler bed is in our bedroom and we’ve tried to get her in there, but she loves sleeping with us.

With the new baby coming, there is no way I’m kicking her out of the bed now. I don’t want her to feel like she’s being tossed aside to accommodate the new kid…

So. In the bed she will stay…. For now…

For the past week or so, I’ve noticed that M had gotten pretty clingy in bed. To go to sleep, she insists on hugging my arm. Because of the pregnancy, it may not be the most comfortable position for me, but I do it anyway.

I pull my arm out as soon as she’s asleep so I can find my own comfortable sleeping position. However, deep into the night, she will literally sit up looking for my arm again.

By then, I’m half asleep and give her the arm. She hugs it until we all wake up for the morning.

I cherish these moments. Soon, she will be out of our bed and no longer needing me for constant comfort. I take advantage of all the hugs and cuddles because they won’t last. They don’t stay this little for very long and I want to hold on to these moments as long as I can…

I don’t know we will adjust when the new baby comes yet. I do know that I will try my best to make sure she knows she still just as important to me as she was before her sister came.

I just hope she won’t have difficulty sleeping when I have the baby and have to stay overnight at hospital. I just hope the baby comes out healthy enough that we don’t have to stay away too long from M at night.

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We co-sleep with M.  I am not ashamed.  I just hate that I always feel like I have to justify it every time someone finds out about it.  There is this particular look I get from people when the find out that M sleeps with us.  It’s this look of, “oh you’re one of THOSE parents…”  Yes.  I’m one of THOSE.

Last week, I was talking with someone about how tired I was because M didn’t fall asleep until midnight and then decided to wake up at 4am.

Person:  So she crawls out of her crib?
Me:  Oh no.  She sleeps with us.

:::THE LOOK:::

Me:  I love it.  I totally works for us.  We all sleep better.  She’s my little cuddle buddy…

I proceeded to go on and on and on about how it’s probably my fault because I’m so attached.. blah blah blah.

I don’t know why I do that every time! 

We co-sleep and I don’t have to explain myself. 

Person:  Aren’t you trying for another one?
Me:  Yes, we find ways.  She also has her toddler bed next to us.  We have other rooms in our apartment.

More justifications spilled out of my mouth.

There are plenty of mothers I know that allow their child into their beds at night.  It’s just not public knowlege.  I don’t know why it’s looked down upon. 

When M was first born, we tried to put her in the bassinet next to us.  It just didn’t work.  With the feedings every few hours, she was constantly back in our bed.  When her feedings were less frequent, we still tried to have her in the bassinet next to us.  I couldn’t sleep.  M would get fussy.  She would end up in our bed.

I finally made the decision to just keep her in the bed.  We both were able to start sleeping through the night.  Things just got comfortable and natural.  It was what worked best for us. 

Yes, two years later, she’s still in our bed.  But I still don’t mind.  There are nights when she does sleep in her toddler bed that is right next to ours.  I also know that she’s only going to be this little once in her life.  We’re still bonding.  She still needs me.  She still looks to me for comfort.  She still smiles so big when she realizes I’m still there when she wakes up.  I know that these moments are limited, I have to make the most of it. 

Yes.  We co-sleep.  And from now on, I’m no longer going to justify it.  It is what it is.  That “look” I get isn’t going to intimidate me into trying to explain myself anymore. 

Everyone has a different parenting style.  Respect mine.

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I knew it was bound to happen..

It’s been several nights now and she’s been doing it each night.

M used to be the best little snuggler in the world.  She used take my arm and just hug it like a teddy bear.

Lately, she’s pushed me away and rolled away from me to fall asleep.

So sad!

She’s growing up and she doesn’t need me for that sort of security anymore.

There are times in the middle of the night where she’ll wake up a little bit, check to see if I’m there, and snuggle up to me.

But then, right when she knows she’s about to fall asleep again, she pushes my arms away, rolls away from me, and then falls asleep.

I know it’s all about growing up, I have to face it.  But, I miss her cuddles and her hugs.

I guess it does make it easier to start thinking about a toddler bed for her..

It’s so true that I’m so much more attached than she is…

Sigh… she’s not a baby anymore..

There’s no better feeling than the feeling of a toddler snuggled up in your arms, fast asleep.

Your feelings of love combined with their feelings of security make for a perfect combination.

It’s all loving and good until….

You have to get up and get ready for work!

Ugh.  It just kills me to have to move her from the security of my arms so I can get up into the cold bathroom..

Plus, who wants to leave their nice warm bed? 

Definitely not me!

It’ll be seventeen months tomorrow, and we are still cosleeping with M.

I know there are times when Hubby wonders when we will finally give M her own bed, but I really enjoy it.  She and I sleep so peacefully.  She no longer moves around all over the place.  She hardly ends up in a wierd position when I wake up to see her in the morning.

In fact, I usually find her snuggled up in my arms, or snuggled up against the bed rail..

I love when she hugs my arm so tightly when she turns to snuggle up against me.. it’s like I’m her security blanket..

Honestly, I really don’t know when we will give M her own bed..

I love having her in my bed, and I think she needs me for the comfort..

I know that if we do end up with another kid, we will have to put her into her own bed.. and I know that when the kids get older, we will definitely have the bed to ourselves.

In the big picture of life, they are only in our bed for a small percentage of our lives..

Why not cherish it?  Kids are only this young once.


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