Living life in the carpool lane..

Archive for August 18th, 2009

Every 4th Thursday of the month, the Cursillo group holds monthly Ultreyas.  We meet and there are usually people that give Witness Talks about how their Faith has affected their lives and how the Cursillo movement has also helped during your Faith Journey..

Well.. this month.. I’m the lucky candidate that gets to give the talk..

I am terrified of public speaking..

Everyone thinks it should be easy.. I sing.. I dance.. on rare occasion I try to act..

I’m a theater person.. I’m a performer.. so how would that make me terrified of speaking in public..

Well.. because PERFORMING.. is way different than SPEAKING..

When performing.. you don’t necessarily have to concentrate on the audience.. the house is dark.. you can’t even see them!  When performing.. you’re like.. in another zone.. sometimes your another character.. sometimes you’re so into a song that you’re singing that you lose track of what’s really going on..

When speaking.. there’s this uncomfortable vulnerability that I still haven’t gotten used to.  It’s literally just me.. in front of people.. staring back at me.. listening to me speak.  It’s intimidating.. I am the most vulnerable when up in front of people.. just me.. not as a character.. not hiding behind a song.. just.. me.

I’m still going to talk.. and I’m going to try my best..

God gives me the strength.. and with that.. I can do anything..

I just hope I don’t stutter!

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August 2009